Sunday, January 22, 2012

karma... or just good directions

It's been a few days since I've had time to write anything, but my mind has been far from absent from this challenge I've set for myself. I spoke with my employer at the beginning of the week about my plans (or lack thereof), and I'm feeling more than  a little nervous about the outcome. It was a very informal conversation wherein I described my need for a change, for a life less focused on financial gains and more family-centric. I let him know that one of the most significant changes I was looking to make was my location, and I mentioned one of the places at the top of the list to move to. Fortunately I wasn't told right out that I would have to find another job, but I wasn't exactly reassured either. At least I think he understood, if not my choices then at least my motivations. It was a good talk, but not one that left me any less nervous about my decision to leave the Toronto area. We left the matter unsettled, with my boss requesting some time to chew things over. It's quite obvious that if I remain here then the corporate world is my proverbial oyster, but as I've mentioned that's just not what I want anymore.

Now I'm not a particularly religious or spiritual person, in fact on most days if you were to ask me what my beliefs were I would probably tell you I was agnostic. This of course is just a pretentious way of saying that I have no idea... that I'm pretty sure that there is more going on in the universe than just you and me, but until I learn a little more myself I don't want to throw all my cards in one pile. The truth is that although I do have a system of beliefs and values, I simply have no way of communicating these to others without sounding like a nutcase, and no desire to try and define or organize the beautiful chaos that is the world around us. I must admit I find most traditional spiritual/religious concepts rather bizarre, but Karma is certainly an exception. I'm not talking about the traditional "do something good and something good will happen to you" sort of blue sky karma that we should all try and live by; no what I tend to believe in is more of a synchronicity, a symbiosis with the world around us. I like to think that if I make the right choices, for the right reasons, then things will find a way of working out. That if I can tune into the world around me, I can find the right path. Sounds kind of simple, but unfortunately the right choices are rarely simple or easy. I truly believe that I now have a decent set of directions for the next phase of my life, and although the road ahead is difficult I think that I am making the right choice; so here is my fire-walk, my test of faith. I have a feeling everything will work out just fine with work, and that will bring me one step closer to figuring out how this is all going to happen.

1 comment:

  1. A ship without a plotted destination will never make it out of the harbour.
    - Earl Nightingale

    I've always believed that if you can set your sites on a destination/goal, the path & right opportunities will appear before you...

    Good luck!

    Cousin Michael